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 2009 List of a Mélange of Things or LOAMOT: 1. Best film: Up in the Air Jason Reitman is quickly becoming one of my favorite directors, from Thank You for Smoking to Juno to this wonderful little film, Up in the Air. The film kind of... directly addresses our own personal fears on love, loneliness, and life. At least it did for me. George Clooney plays the title character, Ryan Bingham, with this suaveness yet, despite the hedonistic attitude towards his vagabond life, he's actually drowning. There's this one scene where he has this look of absolute pain and anguish, and it tore me apart. The sadness and realization that perhaps any hope he had or has will remain as is, that the way he chooses to live his life is to ignore the truth, that the one thing he's looking for will always elude him. This film is both light and dark, funny and tragic, romantic and real, stylish and witty. I think it's good because... it's all of those things at once. Also, the close up rapid shots of daily activities, a la Edgar Wright, made me smile. Oh, you director friends. » Runners-up: Fantastic Mr. Fox, The Hurt Locker, Up, Avatar, An Education 2. Best album: Kid Cudi, "Man on the Moon: The End of Day" My ears perked up when I first heard this album. It was so different from most hip-hop and rap albums I've listened to. It has this... dreamy and ethereal quality, mixed with indie sounds that seems to be the new way for hip-hop and rap. Innovative and one of a kind, this album feels before its time. Plus, if you can sample Lady Gaga on a track and have both Common and Kanye rap on it, then that's quite something. » Runners-up: Local Natives, "Gorilla Manor", Mumford & Sons, "Sigh No More", The Avett Brothers, "I and Love and You", Where the Wild Things Are Soundtrack 3. Best book: A Homemade Life I love the way Molly writes, full of heart and wit. The way she crafts her stories somehow always makes me smile, whether happily or sadly. I also had the chance to meet her in person at the book signing in New York, and she's just as lovely in person. Plus, all her recipes are wonderful! One of my favorite quotes from her book is: "It's going to sound silly, I know, but I think that what it all comes down to is winning hearts and minds. Underneath everything else, all the plans and goals and hopes, that's why we get up in the morning, why we believe, why we try, why we bake chocolate cakes. That's the best we can ever hope to do: to win hearts and minds, to love and be loved." » Runners-up: Zeitoun, Eating Animals 4. Best TV show: The Office This show was so close to being dethroned by my runners-up, but the only thing that kept it there was one episode: Jim and Pam's wedding. So happy. That's all I got. » Runners-up: The Big Bang Theory, Glee, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia 5. Best moment: December 21-26 "I didn't find a perfect moment, because I think that today was just about just having today. And I think that we are one of those couples with a long story, when people ask how they found each other. I will see her every now and then, and... maybe one year she'll be with somebody, and the next year, I'll be with somebody, and it's gonna take a long time... and then it's perfect. I'm in no rush." » Next year: Things are going to start changing for me, or at least I hope. I'm setting in motion something I hope will work out, and I know this all sounds cryptic but... I hope you'll join me on this little journey of mine. As for my personal life: in short, nothing happened with this boy and we are friends. On another cryptic note (more for me), I am a fool in love but a patient fool. Things aren't perfect now, then again nothing is perfect, but I just know that... if everything's not okay, then it's not the end. You can't hurry love, but with warmth and care, it keeps growing. Sometimes you just know when something is a good thing. And somehow, somehow, it always ends up just the way it should be. (Previously: 2008 LOAMOT)  - Paris 1962 - Edges of Asia - Mathematically Correct Breakfast - How a Web Design Goes Straight to Hell - Photoshop Fridge Magnets (be still, my nerdy heart) - Making a Name for Himself, With Just 3 Letters (he's everywhere!) (Previously: Lists, part 30)  During the summer of 2003, I had a summer job. I didn't like or dislike it, but I worked because I needed some kind of experience. I did mostly administrative work, on occasion web and graphic art work. I was well into writing online by then, writing about personal and daily things. I didn't really have a filter then, but that's how we are when we're young. I began reading Dooce before I started writing, so I was well aware of what being dooced meant. But for whatever reason, I thought I could get away with it because, well, I was young and thought I was crafty enough to elude anything and anyone. One day, a co-worker called me into his office. I walked in, thinking he was going to give me something to do but instead, he motioned me over to his computer monitor where I saw, in absolute horror, my blog on his screen. I think I stopped breathing for a few minutes. He looked at me and quietly said, "While there's nothing bad written here—it's entertaining—please take it off. Remove everything." He wasn't going to tell anyone, just our secret. I started breathing again and nodded. Within the next few days, I backed up all my writing and moved everything offline. I eventually resurfaced under a friend's kind hosting and, well, here I am. My writing has evolved through the years, and the way I write online now, I don't consciously hide or disguise things. I write so everyone can somehow relate, so that it's kind of universal. But I won't deny that the above incident shook me a little. So in Dooce's words: BE YE NOT SO STUPID.  Today marks three years at this little corner of the web. I forgot to celebrate two years last year, but we're here now so here's to three years! Thanks for reading, and I hope to continue sharing little moments and stories with you. (One year)  To those who celebrate, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas. The warmest and happiest holiday wishes to you all!  (bigger) While we also had a big snow earlier this year, I think this one counts for this winter. Because the one in March should technically count for last winter, right? Right. Just keep nodding your head. But holy snow, Batman! It was more this time around, and as a creature of the Northeast, I embraced it like an old friend I haven't seen in a while. It hasn't snowed as much in the past few years, and well, I miss it despite the hassles and inconveniences it causes. I love how it makes the world quiet, as if it were pressing pause for us to enjoy this swirling madness and to recognize the little moments we tend to miss. Plus, this snow is light and powdery! Perfect for snowball fights and football (it cushions!).  I never thought I'd actually read my childhood books to another person. I mean, eventually to my kids when/if I have them but not to... another grown person. So, I just finished reading one of my favorite childhood books, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, to a friend over the phone (may he dream about giant pancakes and a Jell-O sunset), and I am still laughing to myself at what just happened. Well, 1) I haven't read that book in a while (seriously, what child knows what Gorgonzola cheese is??) and 2) I haven't read aloud to someone in a very long time. One of the things I look forward to doing, at any point, is reading Harry Potter to kids. To see the looks of wonderment on their faces, and to have them ask, "What happens? What happens!?" is something that would warm my heart. Because if that series transported me at this age, then heck, it must transport kids a million times that. Now I'm looking for all my childhood books. I have a feeling I'll be reading more bedtime stories soon, and oddly enough, I look forward to it. Maybe because I get to finally share a part (a magical part!) of my childhood with another person.  (bigger) While hugging the toilet in the middle of the night, I wondered if this was some kind of punishment. I racked my brain frantically, trying to remember if I had done anything wrong in the past few months. I couldn't think of anything. Another wave was coming and once again into the toilet bowl... It has not been a good year for my health. Granted I caught one cold back in November, I think the stomach flu caps it off. I had it once when I was much younger; it had knocked me out for the duration of winter break, in which I sat unhappily (and painfully) inside while everyone was out sledding. Having it now, when I'm older-- it's a big difference. Instead of it lasting for a week, it lasted for 2 days. Still painful but more manageable, or as manageable as it can be. I found myself lying on the bathroom floor, waiting and waiting and waiting. There's something oddly comforting about the bathroom floor, just the feeling of the cold tiles against your skin. I was hugging the toilet for what felt like an eternity. By the end, I didn't feel better but I felt relieved. I didn't feel feverish anymore, so I hauled myself back to bed. But it was far from over because the next morning, it happened again. At that point, I was getting angry. I looked at my stomach and said, "Are you kidding me?! There's nothing left! How is this still happening?" Eventually it subsided, but not before I broke down in tears. God, I haven't cried in months (I swear, I'm not a robot; I just don't cry a lot), and there I was, slumped against the bathroom wall, crying. "I don't understand," was what kept going through my head. Whether I was referring to my stomach or to life (probably both), I don't know. Eventually the tears subsided, and I pulled myself up off the floor. Just say no... to the stomach flu. "You know all those books I have but I don't let you read?... It's just all these love poems that are about you."  I've been having a string of really bad days at work. Bad as in, getting extremely worn out with the tasks at hand. The trooper that I am, I've pushed through it all because there are ups and downs, and these are the very downs. It's so close to the holidays, I can feel it. "Just a little more, and things will stop being crazy... at least for a little bit," I tell myself. I thought today would be the beginning of a good week, but that quickly ended the moment I stepped off the subway. It was a very heavy case of the Mondays. By the end, I was exhausted from being pulled in so many directions. For the first time I understood why people needed a drink after a long day. So why not? As I walked through the chilly night, I suddenly found myself in front of a door. I pushed it open, stumbling into the dimly lit room, the warmth washing over me. I walked over and she said without hesitation (I guess I looked pitiful), "Well, what can I get ya?" I took a deep breath and said, "Tall raspberry hot chocolate... with extra whipped cream." What'd you think I meant by needing a drink? I watched as the other barista piled on the whipped cream. He paused and looked at me, "More?" Before I could answer, he continued, "Yeaaah, you want more." I guess I really looked pitiful. He handed me my drink and said, "Have a good night." I let out a breath of air as I stepped back out into the cold. Armed with a warm drink, I started making my way towards the subway. I took my time, letting the wind hug me. I sipped my hot chocolate, savoring it for as long as I could. Christmas lights are everywhere now, and they make me happy, twinkling and dancing in the night. It's the little things that make me feel better. By the time I reached the subway, I was warm from the chocolate and, hey, there it was: a tired but small smile on my face. I guess it wasn't so bad today. Things could be worse, you know? Tomorrow's another day, and we'll see what that brings...  (bigger) I haven't been running in a while. By the end of October, I slow it down and run sporadically. So of all days, I decided today would be great, the day after the first snow. It was a crisp 35F, but with the wind chill, just below freezing. As I layered on my clothes, the voice in the back of head kept going, "This is a bad idea." As I laced up my shoes, the voice kept nagging at me. Once I stepped outside, it wasn't the voice in my head but my own voice that went, "THIS IS A BAD IDEA." But of course I went running! As I started to run, I started to laugh. The things I do. Well, it turns out that I actually enjoy running in the cold. I really, truly enjoyed it. Maybe it was because I couldn't feel my face or my hands. Or that no one was outside. Or that the air I was breathing somehow felt fresher and cleaner. I liked it. Three things that made the run worth it: 1. I finally found my old high school softball fleece ear warmer! Still intact, still emblazoned with the my high school team's name. You guys, I've been digging around for this for a while now, and I found it. This thing has kept and still keeps my ears warm like you would not believe, even if it does make my hair look funny afterwards. 2. Running past my favorite spot and hearing the familiar rush of water. 3. The crunching of leaves and twigs.  (bigger) From time to time, I get really nostalgic for my high school days. I think it's the people I miss the most. The other night, I pulled out my senior year yearbook and paged through it. Sometimes I wonder if things would have been different if I hadn't been so painfully shy or if I had socialized just a little more. But I quickly shook myself out of that and remembered where I am now, and how things turned out even better than I thought. I've grown out of my shell through the years, and while it wasn't the most traditional route, I became better friends with everyone after the fact. The holidays tend to do this to me, when everyone's home again. Most of us come home, and most of us still keep in touch. In regards to my previous entry, something always gets me whenever we're sitting around a table at the local coffee shop, talking about everything and anything and nothing at all. Glancing to my left and then to my right, I found old friends catching up, sharing stories and goofing off. We have grown and for some, our lives are about to change in big ways. Yet there we were, together inside a coffee shop on a cool November night. It warmed my heart knowing this. But what warms my heart even more is that, no matter how much we've changed (or not changed), we've accepted everyone--without a second thought--for who they are now. And I think that's a mark of a true friendship. |
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Hi, my name is Amy. Be well, and say hello!
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